In last month’s newsletter the article was called Divorcing Drama and it must have struck a nerve because I got lots of email from women who said “thanks, I needed that.”

Drama is everywhere and somehow we came to believe it’s “just a part of life.” Or is it? For some it’s not only a part of life it’s life’s blood, it’s breathing, food, sustenance. The main point in the article is that midlife is a time when what no longer serves us needs to be let go. Letting go is hard sometimes especially when the payoff–negative or positive–is one we have come to rely on. Think about a cigarette’s effects. It’s not just the nicotine that smoker’s come to the habit for. There is the social aspect, the physical inhaling–that’s a deep breathing exercise in disguise if I ever saw one, the pavlovian stimulus/response conditioning.

Drama can be the same. When we create it–and it’s often within our merlin’s bag of tricks–on a regular basis we get paid in attention, bragging rights, a flood of stress hormones which give us a boost, and a pity party if we are in victim mode.

Maybe you feel I’m being a bit harsh. Let’s pose a few scenarios and see if you change your mind.

Mary puts off paying her sales tax which were due 6 months ago. She looks at the bill every day or so, has the money but doesn’t want to spend it, says “I keep forgetting” when telling her friend how she MUST pay her sales tax. Suddenly, (not) she gets a letter from the IRS saying she owes a 25% penalty which is accruing with interest every day she delays paying. now she has to cough up another $400 which she feels is unfair. Is it or is it drama creation?

Gina has an old car, it’s really old and it has a few problems. She belongs to the duct tape school of repairs and rather than taking the car in for a major–read expensive–repair she “fixes it” herself and worries aloud, “I hope this holds til I get to my sister’s.” She has been saying the same thing for 2 years and finally, about 2/3 of the way to her sister’s, on a major highway with exits spaced 30 miles apart, the car gives up, the engine catches on fire, and she is stranded. Oh, and she never did sign up for AAA even though she “knew” she should. No am I being harsh when I say that some of us are masters at inviting it or can you see how subtly we weave this magic?

We have these blind spots–no one wants to be stranded on the highway of life–that at midlife it’s time to shine a light on. How we do that is by reviewing the things in our lives that make us go, “CRAP” I really ought to do something about this, and then doing that thing you ought to do.

If it’s your health, mental or physical that needs some attention then why not get some information that might help you? Find a new doc, one who listens and practices with alternative as well as western medicine. Get into a mastermind group that works on strengthening self esteem or self care. Perhaps go to an event that’s all about health, what’s new, what’s outside the box but proven safe.

You can stay home and get some great information by joining me for the Midlife Women’s Mind and Body Experts Series. I’ve got 13 experts live on hour long calls throughout the month of September. It’s free and you can sign up here.

It’s not going to cure your life of drama creation but it’s a great place to start learning about how to release it from experts like Dr. Sue Morter and Mary Allen who are masters at releasing techniques and the how of creating something we love vs drama. The other experts–like Dr. Ann Louise Gittleman, Dr. Jonny Bowden, and Dr. Susan Brown are going to help us avoid the drama of lifestyle diseases like obesity, diabetes and cancer. Jan Sinatra is talking to us about women’s heart health measures, Kelley Herring will teach us where hormone damaging chemicals lie in every day life and products and what to substitute. Suzanne Falter Barns is laying bare her soul on spirit guided drama reduction, Jen Louden comforts us with a mini-retreat, Mia Lundin helps us avoid the female brain gone insane syndrome and Amy Ferris, award winning midlife author will help us laugh our way through the drama we do encounter.

Don’t miss out on these wonderful people’s insights and information. Drama is your friend when you are at the top of a high mountain peak cause you trained and climbed it, or on Oprah, or seeing your first book in print. How to get to the good drama? Plan for it, eliminate what might take you away from it like ignoring the gut instincts that tell you to take care of something or show up somewhere.

Well Suzanne Somers has a new book out and this time she’s taken on the conventional wisdom and practice of cancer treatment in this country. Like her or not this book will stir dialogue and encourage people to question the status quo on cancer treatments–which has a woefully poor track record in the success category.

Like so much else of our current medical system, chemotherapy, radiation, and radical surgeries to “kill the cancer or eliminate it” makes people sick and vulnerable on top of sick and vulnerable. While inroads are being made in great cancer centers like Sloan Kettering in New York City, to include complimentary forms of support for the patient, for the most part true alternative practices with proven track records are criminalized in this country.

As midlife women, we are crossing a threshold of age for increasing diseases while also being more empowered to take our health into our own hands. Of all people we should applaud books like hers.

Now before you leave here all in a huff thinking I have no respect for western medicine hear this: I am 100% on the side of complimentary medicine which takes from western, eastern, new and ancient energy modalities, and functional medicine. In no way do I think all western med is bad or all cancer treatment performed in a western setting should be tossed out. I’d like to see patients have options, learn about the alternatives to traditional chemo, radiation and some surgeries. Then make their decision fully informed on what’s out there.

Europe enjoys some of the most sophisticated hospitals and cancer care centers and most practice prevention, support via supplements, natural healing agents, and practices docs in this country can’t even consider trying or face jail time or malpractice suits. Hence a travel trend called “medical tourism.” Americans and others in countries with limited or no access to  proven, safe alternative options to traditional pharmaceutical and surgical practices, are traveling to foreign countries to exercise their rights to try something else. They also travel when health care options cost more than the person can afford here.

The cancer care model is no different than much of the rest of the (disease care) health care model. Much of it is, to quote Dr. Julian Whitaker in his latest newsletter, “Killing houseflies in the kitchen with a shotgun. Yes it can be done, but certainly doesn’t solve the problem–and look what it does to the kitchen.”

In this time of health care debate I’m promoting self care and education about the many ways to do so. Preventing cancer is a strong place to start. And learning about treatment options within and outside of the medical model is important. A book like Suzanne’s simply brings some things into the light for all to see. If more people are interested in alternatives the government will eventually have to accept the practitioners who offer them. Maybe even remove the next to impossible financial and time constraints in testing to get these approved.

Weigh in if this stirs something in you about health care and choice.